There is a version of a woman I keep coming back to.
The Persephone woman.
When I think about Persephone,
before she was in the underworld,
I think I was more like that when I was younger.
Naive in a way.
Not in a negative sense—
just not fully aware of what it meant
to be both.
I thought I was one way,
scared to be another.
But there has always been a part of me
that struggled with being both.
Society tells us we need to be in boxes,
one thing or another.
But I am everything.
Light and dark.
Delicate and ruthless.
Simple and complicated.
I never thought I could be all of it
at the same time.
But the last few years have taught me
to embrace all facets of myself.
To explore them.
To discover them.
To grow them.
I am most like Persephone
when I am empowered, magical, strong.
The Descent
There was a version of me
that felt disconnected.
From myself.
From my body.
From my spirit.
I was tired,
putting everyone before myself,
not spiritually aligned.
That version of me felt chaotic,
unwound,
like I was about to erupt.
I was ungrounded.
I lost touch with who I was
while trying to figure it out.
Trying to fit into boxes
that were never made for me.
The Return
When I couldn’t imagine continuing
to allow chaos to consume me anymore,
something shifted.
I knew I couldn’t accept
anything less than the type of love
that reflects how powerful I am.
And I’m still learning
to lean into that.
Returning wasn’t loud.
It was dreaming,
shedding,
movement,
stillness.
It was pain and pleasure,
life and death.
It was allowing myself
to exist in childlike wonder
while still holding
a warrior’s soul.
Coming back felt like breathing.
Like electricity.
Like pure force
and gentle rain.
I started coming back to myself
when I decided
to love all of me.
I am soft
in fields of flowers,
with nature spirits,
next to trees.
I am soft
in flowing dresses,
with animals, babies,
and the gentle touch
of the man I love
(or hopefully will soon love).
I am powerful
in thunder,
in lightning,
near the ocean.
I am powerful
for those whose voices are soft.
I am a survivor.
A fighter.
I speak from that lens.
All of this meets,
sometimes gently,
sometimes harshly,
on the horizon.
I am both.
When I think of being with someone
who doesn’t dim me,
I feel held.
Supported by my divine counterpart.
I feel delicate,
soft,
safe,
loved.
Safe and powerful love
looks like support,
respect,
calmness,
consistency.
It looks like a strong, secure, safe container
for my wildness.
A home.
I have experienced abuse
on many levels of the world.
I have felt the sting of betrayal
and the dismissiveness of people
that didn’t deserve my kindness.
And yet,
I can admit my faults.
Learning to survive
sometimes created a version of me
that had to be sharp,
that had to be chaotic,
because that was what felt normal.
But I no longer believe
love should feel like survival.
I no longer believe
I should be bending myself
to fit into someone else’s mold.
I no longer believe
real love should be scary.
I am learning
love can be freeing
and grounding.
I am unapologetic now.
Carried with grace,
but no longer hiding
behind people-pleasing.
I have learned
stepping into my power fully.
I am not the woman I once was.
I am the warrior queen.
The divine goddess.
The healer
and the disruptor.
I entered this world as a mosaic,
beautiful,
infinite,
light in the dark.
I emerged
as the phoenix.
Wounded,
but powerful.
A spirit
still becoming.
I am the Persephone woman.
🌿🌑🌸
Capatured by Vanno Photography